GriefSPEAK: Angel wings with footprints – Mari Nardolillo Dias

by Mari Nardolillo Dias, EdD, contributing writer

He kicked her repeatedly in the abdomen. As a teen in her sixth month of pregnancy, she was a bit naïve about pregnancy and birth. Shortly thereafter, she began experiencing strong cramping and delivered the fetus. It was a girl. She screamed at her partner to call a rescue, which he declined for obvious reasons. Their tiny bathroom in her home was smothered in blood as she screamed. She was unaware of the placenta and didn’t quite know what was happening. She thought she may be having twins. Soon the placenta emerged. Her partner swooped up both the fetus and the placenta, wrapped them up and left. Never to be seen by her again.

The incidence of IPV (Intimate Partner Violence) during pregnancy can result in 2.5 times more miscarriages than a pregnancy without violence. IPV and pregnancy is a global issue, and due to the number of unreported miscarriages associated with domestic violence, the numbers are most likely higher.

Experiences like the one above, in addition to thousands more, may result in PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and require a great deal of therapy, and specialized techniques. Many women will disassociate and choose to ignore the experience. Others will seek help. If any of you fall into this category, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233. There is a great deal of footprints with angel wings in jewelry, tattoos, etc. This is the sign. Let’s keep those unborn babies safe.

___

Dr. Mari Nardolillo Dias is a nationally board-certified counselor, holds a Fellow in Thanatology and is certified in both grief counseling and complicated grief. Dias is a Certified death doula, and has a Certificate in Psychological Autopsy.

Dias is Professor of Clinical Mental Health, Master of Science program, Johnson & Wales University. Dias is the director of GracePointe Grief Center, in North Kingstown, RI.  For more information, go to:  http://gracepointegrief.com/